I would argue, that if the Bumble BFF method is what they use for online dating, then it's not that reliable a tool for dating either. What you're describing is the last one I'd want to actively search for a new person in any segment of my life.

The promise of "computer dating" being something for people who DON'T just want to meet someone in a bar or get picked up in a grocery store - for people who actually want some idea if the other person is compatible with them BEFORE they strike up a conversation - never was fulfilled. And once everyone started following Tinder's obnoxious "swipe" methodology, all hope was fucking lost.

And from a generational perspective - there was also a time when there was a stigma on people who had met their spouse in a bar or night club. Back in the day, when they still fed women crap like, "Why would any man buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?" That more and more people are establishing genuine relationships via online dating has nothing to do with online dating apps being a good way to meet people. It's strictly a matter of volume. The more people you go home from the bar with, the higher probability you'll accidentally end up in a long-term relationship with one of them.

This is certainly not the first time I've said any of this or expressed my vast disappointment at what online dating has become. But I've had a few too many people try to tell me lately, that there's an advantage in talking to someone without a meaningful profile, who didn't bother to read yours either, because "you kinda like the look of one another and you never know whether or not you might hit it off." My response to such a notion will always be, "Fuck that." If I end updating a co-worker, a schoolmate, a friend of a friend - it's going to be because we got to know one another somewhat, in that capacity, before dating ever entered the discussion.

I'm not telling anyone else what to base their dating time-commitment on. But in my 30+ years of dating, not once has it been worthwhile to just go by appearance. In fact, dating based on nothing but that is how I ended up in some of the most toxic relationships I've ever been in. And it really sucks that any avenues that had been designed for people like me in the early days, have abandoned those models in favor of "swipe" mentality.

Though I will also offer, that more specific to this article's points - actively searching online for friends has always had the same challenges, because almost all of the "find a friend" sites were connected to online dating and/or hookup tools. Remember FriendFinder dot com? It didn't start off with the word "Adult" in front of it.

Thus, I'm not really convinced we do have the technology, and as long as the viewpoint is so skewed, we're never going to find out.